Daily I visit a little website known as Yahoo. It’s the only way to get the news really. They have this handy little list on the side that tells what the most popular things in the world are at that current moment. Here’s what it says right now.
Pretty lame right? Except for that world’s smallest frog thing. Tiny frogs are great. Anyway, want to know what the trending topics would be if Yahoo was in my brain right now? No? WELL THATS TOO BAD CAUSE I’M GONNA TELL YOU ANYWAY!
01. David Legwand
This guy’s a Nashville Predators hockey player. What with my recent hockey obsession I’ve been watching them play hockey on tv a lot. David Legwand is missing a front tooth. And always is missing it. I have spent minutes of my life wondering if he has a tooth when he’s not playing hockey. Does he take it out to play and put it back in when he goes out into the real world? I DON’T KNOW. It’s eating away at me.
02. Hoodie Draw Strings
Why do these exist? I’ve only seen people use them ironically or to entrap their friends faces as a practical joke. If it’s cold I’ll wear a hood but I don’t tie those darn strings. I find myself chewing on them like a small child would. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.
04. Tennessee Blizzard of 2012
Don’t look it up guys. It doesn’t exist. Apparently everyone who lives here thinks it does though. It snowed yesterday. It was all gone this morning. Yet every school was canceled today. I wish I had grown up here.
I’m real excited for baseball season. I’ve been trying to decide who I should become a fan of here in Nashville. They have a minor league team who goes to Milwaukee so I could like the Brewers. Or I could like the Braves. Or I could like the Cardinals (HA. No I couldn’t!!! JOKES!) But seriously. I need to decide SOON. I need an allegiance to someone or baseball season will be depressing and I’ll just continually remember that I can’t go to the All-Star game in Kansas City and I’ll cry a lot.
07. How do birds mate
SERIOUSLY!!! I don’t get it!
08. Claude Giroux
I somehow found myself watching HBO’s 24/7 Rangers/Flyers Road to the Winter Class. (HA! Found myself watching. I did it on purpose guys!) Claude Giroux plays for the Flyers. The Predators are playing the Flyers tomorrow. I’d like to get up real early and buy tickets in the morning to see him in person. I think I will. Ok. Done thinking.
09. Ilya Bryzgalov
Also from the 24/7 HBO series. Absolutely everything he says is funny. Because he’s Russian. And he’s basically just a nut job. Also all my brain thinks about is hockey I guess.
10. Super Mario Galaxy
I got this game for my Wii for Christmas. It’s like REALLY hard. I’ve been looking up ways to beat it on the internet like the 12 year old cheater I am. I’ve been doing really well at not throwing my controls when it makes me lose over and over and over and over. Maybe I’m losing my Nintendo ability as I age. I sure hope not.
I’m real sorry if you read all the way through that. It had to have been a terrifying experience. Trust me. I live with this everyday. It’s SO scary being my brain.