NBA? More Like No Thank You-a!

[Disclaimer: First of all, I apologize for the title. Sometimes I think I’m more clever than I really am. Secondly I realize the NBA is very popular. Don’t come after me with torches.]

It time that I confess, I don’t get the NBA. It’s all over the TV and internet because apparently some sort of ‘playoff’ scenario is happening right now. A bunch of giant men, trying to win some sort of ring. I don’t know, it seems a little girly to me.

You see once a year, during March Madness, I attempt to understand the world’s fascination with basketball. I last approximately until Gonzaga is knocked out and then I am done. I can’t even last 5 minutes of an NBA game. So ya, I don’t really get it.

But what I do get is:

  • The game is played with a ball.
  • The ball is more formally known as a basketball
  • The point of the game is to get the basketball into the basketball goal.
  • On the basketball goal there is a hoop with a net attached.
  • The ball goes into the net to score a goal.
  • Blake Griffin plays basketball.
  • He dunks the basketball a lot.
  • 90% of SportCenter’s Top 10 anything related to basketball is some sort of dunk.
  • Dunk is a fancy word for jumping up really high and placing the basketball into the hoop forcefully without it ever leaving your hands.
  • There was an NBA lockout.
  • When the lockout happened Blake Griffin did this.
  • Blake Griffin is the only NBA player I care about because of this. Also his dreamy good-looks.
  • There’s also a player named Metta World Peace.
  • Metta World Peace is a moron because he legally changed his name to Metta World Peace.
  • NBA teams, like Metta World Peace have stupid names.
  • The stupidest being the Golden State Warriors. That is not even a real state.
  • Whichever terribly named team can shoot the orange ball into the hoop the most times wins a stupid, shiny, girly, ring, like this:

That’s it. That’s the NBA in a nutshell.

It’s not that I don’t get how it works, I do. I played basketball for a whole 2 months in the 4th grade. And I probably scored at least once. AND I’ve played NBA Jam a lot on Super Nintendo. So ya, I’m pretty great at knowing basketball.

I just don’t GET it, ya know? No? You don’t know? Because you enjoy the NBA? You don’t think it’s a waste of time? Hmm…well, that’s a weird.

I guess, I hope your team wins a ring?

I’ve Been Told I Have a Lovely Blog….

I’m new to this whole blogging community thing. Turns out there’s a whole invisible, made up award competetion.  When you’re nominated for this made up award you have to participate appropriately. At least that’s the message I’m receiving.

So first I guess I’m supposed to thank the person who nominated me. It was this guy at The Life and Times of Nathan Badley. However, I’m almost positive he didn’t do it because he thinks my blog is lovely. I suspect it was solely to ruin my life, because I personally don’t even find my blog lovely and it belongs to me. If it were my child I would feel mediocre about it. So that’s probably bad, but thanks anyway badlandsbadley.

Now the rules of this invisible award say I have to come up with 7 interesting facts about myself. I don’t have any interesting facts about myself. But I’ll do my best.

1. I just watched the finale of Kourtney and Kim Take New York. My main reason was to see Kim’s marriage fall apart. This makes me a horrible person. A really horrible person.

2. I just made some flat bread all by myself. I think I deserve another award for that.

3. I do really stupid things a lot. They mostly involve around watching MTV reality shows.

4. I’ve recently made it my personal mission to tweet to Warner Bros, the NBA, Blake Griffin, Lebron James and Muggsy Bogues every single day until I have convinced all of them to join forces and film a Space Jam sequel.

5. On a related note, badlandsbadley (the bum who nominated me and the sole reason I’m coming up with interesting facts) got tweeted at by Muggsy Bogues. I’m pretty much still writhing in jealousy about this.

6. I didn’t win a contest to get to design a mask for Pekka Rinne, the Nashville Predators goalie, and I’m probably just gonna go ahead and let it ruin the rest of my day.

7. One time I tripped and ripped a large hole in my leg on a pool table. I don’t know if that’s interesting but I think I’m probably the only person capable of such a thing.

Okay there’s 7 not really interesting facts, but I tried. I guess the last step in this nomination process is to send this fun little game to 10 others blogs. I’m not cool enough to have blog friends….so……..this is awkward. Um. I’ll just pull out a neat contest called “the first people to like this and/or comment get nominated” because….I don’t want to make anyone feel bad!….YA THAT’S IT. I don’t want to pick anyone because I don’t want anyone’s feelings to get hurt because I don’t think they’re blog is lovely. It has nothing to do with the fact that I have a serious lack of neat blog friends.

And now no one will like this, or comment and then, well, then I don’t know where we’ll be.